Scarlett Johansson

NAKED PHOTOS OF SCARLETT JOHANSSON! CALL THE FBI!

The FBI is investigating hackers who stole x-rated nude photos from Scarlett Johansson’s cell phone. Excuse us, but is this really an FBI matter? Somehow we imagined the FBI as working on assignments more important to the country. Would they be as involved if an ordinary Joe’s phone had been hacked and HIS not–so-sexy photos stolen? If YOUR cell phone were hacked, would you call the FBI? A private investigator, at most. So THIS is where our taxpayer dollars are going. Surely the Feds have more important things to do. And Scarlett should know better than to have nude photos of her private parts on her phone.

DID WE NEED ANOTHER REASON TO DISLIKE SEAN PENN?

Sean Penn makes himself SO EASY not to like! On Saturday he and Scarlett Johansson attended the White House Correspondents Association dinner and they made a big scene smooching over dinner. Worst of all, according to Page 6, the moody Penn refused to put his hand over his heart like everyone else in the room, and sing “The Star Spangled Banner.” How ungrateful can a person be?

RYAN REYNOLDS HOPES TO MAKE HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND AGNES FISCHER, A STAR

While his exwife Scarlett Johansson is fooling around with Sean Penn, Ryan Reynolds has been keeping himself busy with German model Agnes Fischer. And Ryan has been actively helping his girlfriend cultivate an acting career. He got her a small non-speaking role in his movie Safe House, and he’s also pressuring producers to cast Agnes as his love interest in his next film R.I.P.D. Ryan obviously feels confident that his romance will last, because RIPD starts filming in Boston this summer.

SCARLETT JOHANSSON AND SEAN PENN ARE PLAYING HOUSE

Scarlett Johansson, 26, hoped she wouldn’t be recognized when she picked up a few things at the Malibu supermarket yesterday. Her hair was stuffed under a hat and she dressed down in a baggy grey sweater and black jacket. She’s rumored to have moved into Sean Penn’s Malibu house or at the very least she’s spending all her time there. It looks like she planned to cook a healthy dinner for her 50 year old boyfriend, who is recently divorced just like she is.

MID CENTURY MODERN CASUALTY TO JOHANSSON REYNOLDS DIVORCE

It appears that Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds’ marriage was doing just fine in August because they bought a beautiful restored mid-century modern house with walls of glass in Los Feliz for 2.8 million dollars. The 1960’s 2835 sq ft dream house was designed by Buff & Hensman and originally featured four bedrooms but they had been redesigned into two larger bedrooms. That pretty much leaves out the immediate prospect of kids – which was supposedly one of the marriage problems. Scarlett has a history of bad real estate luck – she sold her last house at a 3 million dollar loss.

SCARLETT JOHANSSON DOESN’T WANT TO BE MARRIED TO THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE

Scarlett Johansson has learned the hard way that being married to The Sexiest Man Alive isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. (Jennifer Aniston can vouch for this fact also.) Scarlett and her husband of barely two years, Ryan Reynolds, have split only a month after Ryan was anointed by People magazine. The actors claim the bustup is due to the fact that they never saw each other because they were always working. (In fact, it IS difficult to find a recent photo of them together.) Didn’t they think about this job situation before they walked down the aisle?

“MILLIONAIRE MATCHMAKER” PATTI STANGER MUST BE FLATTERED BY SCARLETT JOHANSSON PARODY

Now the “Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger KNOWS she has really made it BIG! How many people have the beautiful Scarlett Johansson doing a parody of them on Saturday Night Live? It’s the HIGHEST compliment! Patti must be thrilled! We think Scarlett did an admirable job and the supporting players were quite on target also. If you missed it, take a first look.

SCARLETT JOHANSSON MAKES SOMETHING OUT OF NOT MUCH

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Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin

Scarlett Johansson’s sexy ad for the Mango stores is misleading at best. We visited a Mango shop for the first time and noted that the merchandise is not unlike that of Zara. It’s affordable, sensible business wear for secretaries and assistants. Plus some jeans and tank tops for the weekend. Basic stuff. Nothing sexy or extravagant and certainly nothing to get excited about. We’re guessing Scarlett would never shop there unless she was paid to do so.