Height Challenged

JUSTIN BIEBER CLEVERLY DIVERTS ATTENTION TO HIS HAIR

Justin Bieber fans who are expecting him to have a growth spurt now that he’s turning seventeen on March 1, are in for a disappointment. He’s probably destined to be a shortie for life because he has tiny parents. His mom Pattie is 4’8” (Snooki size) and his father Jeremy is 5’5.” Genes rule, so Justin, who claims to be 5’5” in shoes, might not have far to go. We’re thinking he was embarrassed by some his own lame comments to Rolling Stone (about abortion and thinking the 1969 Apollo moon landing was a “conspiracy,” for instance) and THAT’S why he decided to divert attention to a new haircut.

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THE FRENCH PRESIDENT MAKES TOM CRUISE LOOK TALL

French President Nicolas Sarkozy and his wife Carla Bruni voted together in Paris. Rumors of infidelity continue to dog their marriage, but no women (or men) have come forward and sold their “kiss and tell” stories to magazines there, and the First Couple is still together. Did you know he is only 5’5” and always wears lifts in his shoes?

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