Bette Davis

FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELTS, MADONNA IS BACK!

Madonna will NOT be taking off that eye patch anytime soon, so get used to it! She’s making the rounds on TV, radio, whatever – to promote her Madame X album (which is getting decent reviews) and she has a monumental summer tour planned. Ticket prices are astronomical – can she still fill all those seats? Never underestimate Madonna – (does anyone else think she’s starting to resemble Bette Davis, just a little?)

Photo Credit: BACKGRID-USA

LINDSAY LOHAN IS TURNING INTO BETTE DAVIS

She has never looked more conservative- Lindsay Lohan showed up at the AMFAR event in Cannes wearing PEARLS and a short sleeve dress. She’s been absent from showbiz for awhile and wants to assure producers that she can now be taken seriously. Lindsay has been actively trying to drum up a job for herself – she’s shopping around a social media prank show called The Anti-Social Network. Lindsay was also heard bragging about a series she’s writing about women involved with those billionaire business leaders in Russia who basically run the country for their own benefit. She hopes to star and direct and sell the series to Netflix. Will someone take a chance on her?

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

JOAN CRAWFORD AND BETTE DAVIS WOULD HAVE LOVED RYAN MURPHY

Ryan Murphy has already successfully filmed six out of eight episodes of FX’s “Feud” and he’s made SURE that not a single photo of Jessica Lange or Susan Sarandon in character has leaked out. We hear that Jessica in makeup is a dead ringer for her character Joan Crawford, and Susan already has those Bette Davis eyes! The story celebrates the two stars’ rivalry, and takes place at a dinner at gossip columnist Hedda Hopper’s (played by Judy Davis) house right before the two stars were set to film “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” Two women over 50 starring in a movie would never happen today and the plot examines the desperation that mature women in Hollywood suffered then and now. We hear that Jessica Lange and Judy Davis have become fast friends on and off the set. Thanks heavens for TV, or these women wouldn’t be working!

(Above, the real Bette and Joan pretending to be civil.)

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO BETTE DAVIS AND JOAN CRAWFORD?

Is Ryan Murphy actually thinking of reinventing the essentially PERFECT 1962 movie “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” It featured two of the greatest all time movie legends and gay icons, Bette Davis and Joan Crawford, in their decline. In perhaps the best B movie ever made, screen queens Bette and Joan appeared in shockingly unflattering roles – each one desperate to out-act the other. (Coincidentally, it was also filmed at recognizable places in our own Hollywood neighborhood.) Fortunately, Ryan is NOT remaking the film. He’s documenting the bitter rivalry behind the scenes between the two actresses leading up to Baby Jane in an anthology series for FX called Feud. Sounds like fun, but it’s hard to picture Susan Sarandon as Bette – Jessica Lange as Joan seems more plausible. Surprise – Brad Pitt is co-producing with Ryan.

CASTING CALL FOR “WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO BABY JANE?” REMAKE

The 1962 gruesome cult movie “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?” is in the works for a remake directed, for some reason, by Walter Hill. Hill is best known for his macho action movies and westerns. Evidently he wants a change of pace. As you may recall “Baby Jane” is about two sisters fallen on hard times. Jane, played by Bette Davis, was a former child star, and Blanche, played by Joan Crawford, was a former movie queen. Jane had degenerated into a slatternly alcoholic who dressed like a ten year old, and Blanche was helpless in a wheelchair from an auto accident. They were forced to live together in a decaying Hollywood mansion in Hancock Park. So let’s throw out some casting ideas!! Of course, Faye Dunaway is everybody’s first choice for Blanche, but if she says no – how about Jessica Lange or Charlotte Rampling? (Actually Faye could play either role.) As for Jane, we could imagine Kathy Bates or Kirstie Alley in the part. Any suggestions out there?