Anna Nicole Smith

ANNA NICOLE SMITH: SUDDENLY A LEGEND

adv_2636.JPGAnna Nicole Smith died at the age of 39 today. We’ve enjoyed tracking her career ever since her first Guess ad back in the 90’s. She was a great beauty and one of a kind character who seemed destined for tragedy. (If she had heart problems, the Trimspa people must be very nervous.) Dying young guarantees she’ll become a legend. We will miss her.

All Men Are Jerks

Recently wed Anna Nicole Smith, may feel differently today, but we remember in 1998 when…
A conservative couple was dining at the Two Bunch Palms resort restaurant in Palm Springs when Anna Nicole Smith pranced into the dining room wearing nothing but a bathing suit. Much to their surprise, Anna plopped down at their table and started philosophizing about men. “All women want is to be loved – and all men are jerks!” she moaned. The man turned red because she was caressing his leg under the table! Anna asked the wife if she’d like a piece of fruit and put a strawberry in her mouth and leaned over to feed it to her. A friend of Anna’s came and pulled her away but not before Anna invited the blushing couple for cocktails later!

MR AND MRS SMITH?

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Today Howard K Stern’s dreams came true. According to reports he and Anna Nicole Smith were married in the Bahamas this morning – two days after Howard announced (in a trance-like state) their marriage plans on Larry King Live. Howard always had a strange lawyer -client relationship with Anna. He gave up his law practice to be her full time companion. For years he quietly adored her and did whatever outrageous thing she asked him to do. He was on every episode of her reality show on E! and hung in there while she ballooned in weight and finally lost it all. He was by her side through all sorts of boyfriends (and maybe some girlfriends ) not to mention numerous court appearances. And he was there when she needed a father for her new baby. He never gave up and he got what he always wanted. At least SOMEBODY’S happy!

DEAD SILENCE

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Anna Nicole Smith has more than one mystery brewing in her life. It involves two people who were far more prominently featured on her reality series than her son Daniel. Anna’s “lawyer” and confidant , Howard K Stern, who wasn’t above dressing up in drag with her for fun, is oddly silent in her life lately. Howard, whom many people felt harbored a massive crush on Anna, has for years been her spokesperson. Just about every journalist in town had Howard’s number and we all consulted with him regularly about Anna. Howard is with Anna in the Bahamas, but she suddenly chose to have a LOCAL lawyer do the talking for her. There hasn’t been a peep out of Howard. What’s up with THAT? And while we’re on the subject, does anybody know whatever happened to Anna’s woebegone assistant Kimmy, from the TV show?

Punch Drunk

In 1998, the gorgeous Anna Nicole was provocatively seated in the lobby drinking glass after glass of champagne when she started “harrassing” a Middle Eastern man. According to a witness, she loudly taunted him with lewd remarks – the least of which was “C’mere baby and gimme some lovin’.”
Other hotel guests complained about her behavior and the bartender cut her off. THAT made her furious and she stormed out to get her car. The valet offered her a limo and suggested she shouldn’t drive. Irate Anna threw a tantrum and the bellman rushed over to calm her. She punched him in the nose. Hotel security had to wrestle her face first into the mud to get her under control until cops came, cuffed her, and took her away!

Shop Shop

2004: Anna Nicole Smith is on a mad shopping spree since she dropped all that weight. She swept int Betsey Johnson at the Beverly Center and started picking out armloads of clothes. She took them to the dressing room and was thrilled to note that she was now a size 8. Anna came out and modeled her choices for everyone while singing along to the Madonna CD playing. After 45 minutes she piled up several figure revealing dresses, a pleated schoolgirl skirt, and plenty of sexy camisole tops in girly colors like pink, mint, red, or floral prints. Delighted with her new bod, Anna whipped out a credit card which read Vicki Marshall to pay the $1300 bill, and blew everyone red lipstick kisses on the way out.