Mike Sorrentino

Jersey Shore’s Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is apparently in rehab but his reps insist he is merely “at an undisclosed location for rest and recuperation” due to his grueling schedule. The late Elizabeth Taylor is the only person we know of who would check into a hospital when she was tired. Insiders say Mike has a “too much nightlife” cocaine and sleeping pill problem which is exactly what we expected, and explains his odd behavior. (Could steroids be involved in this also?) He probably doesn’t want to admit it because people will be scrutinizing his indulgences when he gets out, but, hey, it IS good for the upcoming sixth season ratings!