Andy Dick


Photo Credit: Buzz Foto

Andy Dick probably thought he was doing everyone a favor by riding his bike to a nightclub instead of driving. But as calamity laden as his driving is, his bicycle riding is not much safer. Here he narrowly misses some pedestrians and a pack of photographers in front of Parc, causing everyone to scatter. We wonder if the doormen all back up when they see him coming since he showed a propensity for shoving his hands in doormen’s pants.


Yuppie looking Andy Dick invaded Tiny’s K.O. – a punk rock dive bar on Hollywood Blvd., and his behavior was decidedly WEST Hollywood. Fortified by many substances, Andy proceeded to squeal “Oh, you’re SOOO cute! Wanna drink?” and he bought drinks for anyone who looked at him. Boozed up Andy hit on the skinheads, mohawked rockers, and a few girls. Incredibly, he started groping and tryng to KISS the fiercely tattooed skinheads. One roared “There’s not enough booze in the world to make me kiss YOU! – grab me again and I’ll WHACK you” Andy chirped “I LOVE to get hit!” Randy Andy topped off his rampage by giving unwanted lapdances to outraged rockers. Nobody got seriously mad because Andy WAS paying for all the drinks. When he collected his credit card before leaving, Andy announced “I’m coming back to BUY this bar!”


The National Enquirer is coming out with a hilarious story about a guy who calls himself John Arnold, who PICKED UP loony Andy Dick in a Hollywood nightclub. Arnold described Andy as “snorting cocaine like a vacuum cleaner” – yet they ended up in a Japanese restaurant together. John, trying to make the best of this odd date, was appalled when Andy “grabbed the waiter by the crotch and began kissing him on the face- the waiter fought off his advances.” Amazingly, Arnold nonetheless agreed to give Andy a ride home. On the way home Andy “saw a patrol car and pulled out a baggy of coke and tried to snort the entire contents at once.” When Arnold protested, Andy kicked and broke his windshield and punched him in the face before he took off running down the street. The hapless “date” reported the incident to the police – and hopefully to his own psychotherapist.


Beige on Tuesday nights at Falcon is even more fun than everyone’s been telling me! The food was yummy (lamb chops) and the crowd was eclectic. Here are some highlights from last night:


Falcon was abuzz because Mayor Villaraigosa was dining without fanfare in a back booth. Andy Dick insisted we butt into the mayor’s dinner – he wanted me to take a picture of them together. (The mayor couldn’t have been more accomodating.) Andy instructed me to email him a copy as soon as possible. He’s gonna love this.

In exchange, I had Andy take a photo of me with the mayor. I’m surprised at how well it turned out. The mayor said he eats in a different restaurant in LA every night. It’s a great way to keep in touch with his constituents.

Kathy Griffin told me she’s “recovering” from her divorce. Now that she’s single and has a 7300 square foot house with a view, she’s quite a catch. She says that pricey house keeps her motivated to work non-stop. I couldn’t help but notice we share a preference for unnaturally bright colored hair.