Madonna

PRESIDENT OBAMA CAUSED MADONNA TO DROP HER PRETENTIONS – FOR A MINUTE

It’s not often that Madonna has an adrenaline rush that renders her speechless but meeting President Obama when they were both backstage at the Tonight Show did just that. And what a relief it was to observe Madonna drop all her pretenses of grandeur and giggle like a schoolgirl! She proudly posted an Instagram photo of them together like a delirious teenage fan. But her caption tells it all. She wrote: “A meeting of the Leo’s – A Cosmic Convergence.” She BRAGGED about sharing the same ASTROLOGICAL sign as the Prez, like a VALLEY GIRL!! (Do educated people follow astrology?) And she misspelled “Leo’s” – there is no apostrophe. Madonna loves to impress with infrequently used vocabulary words like “reductive” so she threw in the hardly appropriate “Cosmic Convergence.” But it WAS fun to see Madonna reduced to a groupie girl fan.

MADONNA COULDN’T CARE LESS THAT HER BROTHER CHRISTOPHER GOT MARRIED LAST WEEKEND

So much happened this last weekend that few people seemed to notice that Madonna’s brother Christopher Ciccone, 55, got married – and that includes his sister. Of course Madonna and Christopher have had a tumultuous relationship. At one time the artistic Christopher directed Madonna’s music videos, helped design her stage shows, and decorated her homes. They were very close until she “fired” him and accused him of slacking off and substance abuse. (At that time he was also described as being “obnoxious.”) In 2008 Christopher wrote a tell-all book titled “Life With My Sister Madonna” describing Madonna’s MANY idiosyncrasies and to no one’s surprise, she didn’t speak to him for four years. Christopher says he and Madonna are in touch by email, but she was not involved in his marriage to British hairdresser Ray Thacker in Beverly Hills Saturday. As far as we know, she didn’t send a gift either.

Photo: Instagram

MADONNA AT THE MET: ANOTHER REASON FOR ROCCO TO STAY IN THE UK

After four months apart, Madonna and her runaway son Rocco, 15, just had a nice reunion in London at the end of April. Rocco is still living with his father Guy Ritchie, but he spent time with Madonna at her London home and he took her to his favorite skate park. Madonna posted a cute photo of them together looking chummy. Then she flew home and dressed in this strangely inappropriate outfit for the Met Ball. Do you suppose it might embarrass her kids? (They will be teased!) She’s a shoo-in for the Worst Dressed list.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

LUCKY LOURDES LEON WAS BORN BEAUTIFUL

It was only a matter of time. Madonna’s “little girl” Lourdes Leon resisted getting involved in modeling until her mother’s friend Stella McCartney made her an offer she couldn’t refuse. Lola, 19, is still at the University of Michigan studying musical theater, but she took time off to participate in Stella’s Pop fragrance campaign aimed at aspiring about-to-be successful young women. (She’s the one on the far left)

MAYBE MADONNA ISN’T THE PERFECT MOTHER SHE THOUGHT SHE WAS

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Rocco Ritchie, 15, looks happy as a clam skateboarding in London. A month ago he ditched him mother Madonna on her Rebel Tour and went to stay with his dad, director Guy Ritchie. He says he prefers the normal family life he has with Guy and his wife Jacqui and their 3 kids. Rocco has lots more freedom in London where he isn’t so often recognized. (And it’s easier to flirt with girls.) The probability of a real custody battle became clear when Rocco did NOT show at his fancy NY school on Monday after the Christmas holidays. And Madonna thought she was the perfect mom!

SEAN PENN CLAIMS HE WAS NEVER VIOLENT WITH MADONNA – OR ANY OTHER WOMEN

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The fact that Sean Penn is suing Lee Daniels for ten million dollars for claiming he’s a wife beater is a FASCINATING turn of events. Daniels had offhandedly commented to The Hollywood Reporter that Empire star Terrence Howard’s record of violence against women was no worse than Marlon Brando’s or Sean Penn’s – in other words “no big deal.” We’re SHOCKED that Penn, who seemed to enjoy his bad boy rep, took offense. Penn claims that although he’s had problems with the law, he’s never been CONVICTED of domestic violence. We remember the violent episode many years ago that ended his marriage to Madonna. She told her close friends about it but never discussed it in public. Granted, the hot -tempered actor may not have been ARRESTED for domestic violence – but he knows in his heart he’s GUILTY. The women in question preferred to avoid public embarrassment by calling attention to his behavior. Or maybe they were AFRAID. It certainly would be interesting if Madonna were called to testify in this case – would she tell the truth?

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
SEAN PENN CLAIMS HE WAS NEVER VIOLENT WITH MADONNA

MADONNA IS AS OFFENSIVE AND ENTERTAINING AS EVER

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Madonna’s Rebel Heart Tour performance at Madison Square Garden was described as “3 hours of proving what a goddess she is.” Rolling Stone raved over her performance and praised her expansive “Olympic level choreography.” Who puts on a better concert than Madonna? – and she’s 57 years old! She still loves to shock: The show includes transgender “nuns” gyrating on crosses/stripper poles. It’s funny that she makes fun of Catholicism but never has bearded Hasidic men gyrating their abs. Opening act Amy Schumer also hit a home run with the crowd. Ex-husband Sean Penn was in the first row and brought his excited daughter Dylan backstage to meet Madonna. Sweet.

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

GUY RITCHIE GOT OVER HIS FEAR OF MARRIAGE CAUSED BY MADONNA

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Guy Ritchie, 46, finally got over his marriage phobia when he tied the knot with model Jacqui Ainsley, 33, this weekend. Guy and Jacqui have been together for five years and they have three children. Despite the fact that they felt like “soulmates,” Guy was reluctant to make it legal. His eight year previous marriage to Madonna made him very cautious about taking that step again. Madonna was not easy to live with (remember all that Kabbalah? And all those food restrictions?) – and she nearly ruined his career. Madonna insisted on getting involved in his film-making and the results were disastrous and embarrassing. They were two smart people – just not meant for each other. Guy is convinced he got it right this time. (Top photo: David Beckham, David Ritchie, and Jason Statham before the ceremony. Below, Instagram wedding pic)

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

SUMMER VACATION FOR COLLEGE GIRL LOURDES LEON

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Lourdes Leon, 18, has finished her first year at the University of Michigan as a Performing Arts major, and she’s back in New York for summer vacation. She returned home with a nose ring and silver dyed hair (the rage in London.) Lola discourages her mother Madonna from visiting her at school unless absolutely necessary because she creates such a stir. When Madonna DOES visit, they avoid walking down the street together. Will Lola have a summer job? Chances are she’ll work on the Material Girl clothing line before the family takes its yearly vacation in late August.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

MADONNA SAYS PARIS REMINDS HER OF NAZI GERMANY

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Maybe those clunky platform shoes aren’t as easy to walk in as we thought. Madonna has two strapping young men helping her into her hotel in Paris where she’s promoting her new single “Living for Love.” We wonder if she wears those shoes just to thumb her nose at people who accuse her of dressing “too young.” She just announced a world tour for her Rebel Heart album, coming out March 6. While in Paris, she startled many people by comparing France to Nazi Germany. She feels the country no longer embraces everyone or encourages freedom.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI