Bicycle

PATRICK SCHWARZENEGGER BICYCLES THE HARD WAY

File this under “creative ways of working out during a pandemic.” Since gyms closed, we’ve seen a LOT of celebrities out walking and riding bikes that we’ve NEVER seen exercising in public before. They have to find new ways of working muscles accustomed to gym equipment. Patrick Schwarzenegger has expert tips from his father Arnold, and today he was riding a stand-up bicycle that we never knew existed. A whole different challenge for leg muscles and balance. Hopefully he will avoid heavy traffic…

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SACHA BARON COHEN: GASPING FOR AIR

Something that never occurred to us until recently: riding a bike, running, or exercising is VERY difficult to do with a mask on! Even going to the supermarket wearing one of those high power medical masks is painful because they are SO tight and hot and inhibit breathing. We don’t know how people who work in hospitals manage to wear them all day! Sacha Baron Cohen struggled as long as he could and when the coast was clear, pulled his mask down to take a breath while riding in Beverly Hills today. His movie The Trial of the Chicago 7 is still set to come out in October…

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PREGNANT KATHERINE SCHWARZENEGGER HAS A PERSONAL TRAINER

Arnold Schwarzenegger has no intention of having has first grandchild born into a slothful world. Ever since he learned that his daughter Katherine is expecting her first child with husband Chris Pratt, he has been scheduling sensible exercise for her. Chris (in black) and Katherine (in white) rode through Venice with Arnold and his buddies today, but sometimes Katherine had a hard time keeping up. Don’t worry – when her dad is done with her, she will be leading the pack.

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SUDDENLY SIMON COWELL IS PEDALING FOR HIS LIFE

Simon Cowell admits he is “terrified” of catching coronavirus. He’s been wearing masks every time he leaves the house for WEEKS, and he’s popping vitamins right and left. Why so panicky? Simon is not only 60, but he’s in the habit of smoking 80 cigarettes a day. When Gabrielle Union was fired from AGT, she threatened to sue Simon for “endangering her life” with his illegal smoking on the set. Years of smoking makes Simon a candidate for a very bad virus outcome. Note that Simon is NOT wearing his elevator shoes while riding today with his partner Lauren Silverman, her son Adam Silverman, and their son Eric Cowell.

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ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER: DO WHAT I SAY, NOT WHAT I DO!

Does Arnold Schwarzenegger realize that he is sending a very strange mixed message? He had sweatshirts made picturing him and his miniature horse and donkey that say “DON’T BE AN ASS – STAY INSIDE.” Of course, that’s NOT what Arnold is doing himself. Every day he is outside riding his bike or motorcycle – today he rode with son Patrick and a friend. And NO sign of gloves or masks! Afterward they all stopped at the Country Mart in Brentwood for coffee and a snack. Do we see THREE ASSES?

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SUDDENLY ADAM SANDLER CARES ABOUT HIS WEIGHT

Adam Sandler is venting his frustration by riding his bike every day. Since his acclaimed film Uncut Gems set his career and popularity into high gear he’s been planning a tour of personal appearances. Due to Social Isolation, his 100% Fresher tour had to cancel and postpone dates in March and April. Adam is afraid he’ll pack on the pounds if he doesn’t stay active so he’s very serious about his exercise. Sometimes he rides with his wife Jackie (like today) or his kids, but he’s out there EVERY day.

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CONAN O’BRIEN KNOWS A LOT OF PEOPLE DEPEND ON HIM

We’ve seen photos of a lot of celebrities riding their bicycles around Brentwood, but for some reason we were really surprised to see Conan O’Brien working out by himself on a mountain bike, and wearing a helmet for safety. He just never seemed like the physical type, but it looks like he wants to stay healthy. He’s been a late-night host for 26 years, and started producing his TBS show from home this week. 75 people work for the Conan show and he’s trying to keep as many employed as possible. Conan promises “The quality of my work will not go down, because technically, that’s not possible.”

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KATE HUDSON CAN’T STOP PEDALING

Kate Hudson is not about to let fear of coronavirus stop her from getting her exercise. She took advantage of a break in the bad weather to take her family for a bike ride. Kate HAS to look good – she’s the face (and body) and her successful athleisure collection Fabletics, so she’s highly motivated.

Dear readers: Please keep in mind that gossip is VERY scarce at this strange time – no one in Hollywood is working! Or misbehaving, so it seems! We will endeavor to amuse you with celebrity photos and observations until this is all over!

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BRUCE WILLIS HAD A BREAKDOWN IN PUBLIC

Bruce Willis was feeling pretty good about himself riding his bike in Brentwood when something went terribly wrong and it stopped rolling. He was looking at the bike in exasperation when several road workers noticed and took pity on him. The guys turned the bike upside down and attempted to fix it, but without success. They tossed it in the back of their truck and happily offered the stranded Die Hard star a ride.

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